Inter-universal Teichmüller theory explained

Normally a message such as the one below would go immediately to the rubbish bin. Fortunately for me, I happened to open it accidentally and thereupon discovered the most cogent explanation to date of IUT. I hereby share with you (in its entirety) the following email which was sent to me by a gentleman going by the name Samarium Beesix.

PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL:

16.01.20

DEAR SIR,

PLEASE FORGIVE THIS INTRODUCTION. THIS MORNING I WAS LOOKING AT IMAGES FOR INTER UNIVERSAL TEICHMULLER THEORY.

I DISCOVERED ONE PARTICULAR IMAGE, A SKETCH FROM SOMEONE AT MSRI, WHICH CONTAINS A FAMILIAR LOOKING GEOMETRY.

IN DECEMBER OF 2014 I WAS SENT A PHOTOGRAPH OF A STRANGE OBJECT WHICH APPEARED IN THE SKY OVER BEECHEN CLIFF IN BATH.

THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE PHOTOGRAPH WAS STANDING AT THE ABBEY CHURCHYARD IN BATH – IN BETWEEN THE RECENTLY ERECTED WOODEN HUTS FOR THE BATH CHRISTMAS MARKET.

THERE WAS ALSO A MALE AND FEMALE WITNESS TO THE EVENT WHO WERE WALKING PAST, THEY WERE COMPLETELY NONCHALANT AND UNPHASED BY THE INCIDENT.

THE MALE ACTUALLY AFFIRMED WHAT THEY HAD SEEN AND SAID:

‘SO WHAT?’

THE EYE WITNESS SAID THAT THE LIGHTS IN THE PHOTOGRAPH WERE ATTACHED TO A VERY LARGE AND NON-SYMMETRICAL MUSTARD COLOURED FRAME. AND NO, THEY WERE NOT CHRISTMAS LIGHTS.

THE SURFACE OF THE GIGANTIC FRAME WAS PITTED WITH WHAT LOOKED LIKE DARK IRREGULAR POOLS OF WATER, RATHER LIKE THE WATER THAT RESTS ON A SURFACE AFTER RAINFALL.

THE EYE WITNESS ALSO SAID THAT THE LATTICE FRAME HAD SOME FORM OF HEAT HAZE AROUND IT.

THE CAMERA USED TO TAKE THE PHOTOGRAPH WAS NOT OF THE BEST QUALITY. THE SLIGHT DISTORTION OF THE IMAGE WAS CAUSED BY CAMERA SHAKE, AS WELL AS THE LENS BEING FULLY EXTENDED TO CAPACITY.

PLEASE EXERCISE PROFESSIONAL DISCRETION. THANK YOU.

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One Response to Inter-universal Teichmüller theory explained

  1. Persiflage says:

    To anonymous Proustian commenter: you might be surprised how little I care, I think is a summary of my answer.

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